Parenting Girls

As a mother you can have an enormous influence on your daughter's lifelong pursuit of physical fitness or sports. Here are some tips on how to help your daughter develop a love of sports and get the most of her sports experience.

While participation by girls in sports has increased at all levels, Olympic, professional, college and high school, and society is now more accepting than ever of female athleticism, the fact that girls continue to drop out of sports at six times the rate of boys is an indication that we still have a long way to go as a society in reaching the goal of gender equality in sports.

It is well known that sports are good for girls. Sports teach girls commitment, respect for others, how to relax, concentrate under stress, set and achieve goals, accept responsibility and failure and be gracious winners.

On June 19, 1999, I was privileged to witness a truly magical happening- the opening ceremonies and games of the 1999 Women's World Cup. From my seat on the fifty-yard line at a sold-out Giants Stadium I was one of 78,972 fans comprising, to that point, the largest crowd in the history of women's sports and of Giants Stadium.

There are many factors for a parent and an aspiring young female athlete to consider when deciding whether she should play on a boys' team. Is she pretty adept at the fundamentals? Are her skills on equal footing with the boys? Does she thrive on the competition? Is the coach gender-blind - giving equal opportunities to every one? Is it an environment where masculinity and femininity are not questioned? If you can answer yes -- then let her play!

Some people are under the impression that asserting oneself is "unladylike" or "improper". In reality, however, learning how to be assertive can give you a sense of inner integrity. Being assertive is the ability to express feelings, to say "no", to ask favors, to question the coach. How does one learn to get what they deserve in an appropriate way? You need to develop an assertive approach that enables you to act in your own best interests- in a comfortable manner. You have to have a "game plan' for the next situation that arises.

By age 12, girls are six times more likely to drop out of sports than boys. Why? One of the reasons, say experts, is that girls simply do not receive as much positive reinforcement about their sports participation as boys. Boys get to see male athletes on televised sports; they can see their photos in newspapers and magazines; and there are plenty of books for boys about male sports heroes. Boys learn at a very young age that it is not only okay to enjoy sports but that their success will be supported by their families and society. Girls see far fewer female athletes on television; coverage of women's sports in newspapers and magazines, while increasing, is far less than that given to men's college and professional sports. There are very few books for girls about female sports heroes that girls can read as they grow up; athletes whose success our daughters will want emulate and see as role models.